In which I lament the problems of being a HUGE book nerd
I don’t know about you, but for the most part (pretty much every part) of being a book nerd is a wholly fulfilling, inspiring, and lifelong obsession that I never, and will never, have a problem with. But every once in a while something happens that just makes you go, “Why do I do this again?!” I enjoy lists (and even numbers), so I figured I’d detail ten of the problems I occasionally deal with in my bookish life. Do you relate to any of these?
In no particular order (I think organizing it into a list is probably order enough). Please know that this is an, at times, exaggerated, sarcastic, and generally not-always-serious post.
- You want to lend the books you love to all of your friends, but you can’t because you know they’d ruin them: one of your friends is a spine breaker, another is too messy and will spill something on it, yet another will probably lose it and/or never give it back. How do you share your love of a book with someone who will DESTROY it like that asteroid who killed all the dinosaurs?
- Your new book boyfriend has completely ruined all other boys for you: you know that swoon worthy boy who serenades you with his words, stares deep into your soul, and changes you forever? Yeah, he’s not real.
- You are completely unable to walk into a bookstore (or any freaking store with books!) without buying one: Did you walk into Target with a specific thing to buy, like a pair of jeans or some deodorant? Sorry, but you’ll be leaving with four new books and neither of the things you actually need.
- You get crazy looks from people when you cry and/or laugh in the middle of a public place and there’s no one around you: Remember when you were on the train home and you broke down into intense sobs while reading The Fault In Our Stars and thought you did a good job covering it up by pretending you had allergies? Yeah, no one bought that. Sorry.
- You’re in constant danger: you are constantly shelling out more cash in order to fit your never ending piles of books rather than risk the potential avalanche that would totally kill you.
- You’re a liar: “Sorry, I can’t go. I already have plans.” Yeah, that was a lie. You just have a good book that you’d rather spend all night buried in instead of feeling uncomfortable and wishing you could leave all night. The guilt of lying to your friends haunts you, but honestly, you’re probably happier.
- You’ve got BPS: Book Pain Syndrome. Dude, it’s a legitimate thing. You are constantly trying to find the perfect position in which to read. Your back is spasming, you’ve got aches and pains all over the place, and one of your legs is asleep.
- You’re broke: Work, you know that thing that means you can keep buying books? Yeah, it gets in the way of actually reading the books. It’s a necessary evil though.
- You yell at movies: Seeing trailers for book to movie adaptations literally makes your heart race. Sometimes because they look amazing and sometimes they don’t. But no matter what, you know they’ve changed it. You know it. They removed your favorite scene or added dialogue that just doesn’t make sense. It’s different, and you’ll be disappointed.
- Your TBR: it will never end. You will constantly add more books to it and you know you’ll never get to all of them. This is the most soul crushing realization in the entire world. You will never have enough time to read it all.
These are some intense problems, but you know what? None of them will ever outweigh the pure joy, inspiration, and solace you can find by diving into a book and losing yourself. It doesn’t matter that people stare at you or you’d rather spend time with your book boyfriend than going to a party. You not only make friends in the books, but you make friends with other bookish people because they understand you on a fundamental level that can bind you for life. Never stop reading.
What are some of the bookish problems you have?